Lesbian Fuck Club (2012)

Based on: Fight Club (1999)

“The first rule of fuck club is you DON’T tell the guys about fuck club.” And the second is you do tell the hot girls, so the box art tells us. This is actually a lie. As Lily Cade, the director and star tells us the rules are as follows:

1. No Men (okay so the first was actually true)
2. No Bullshit (not sure why thats a rule)
3. If it’s your first time, you have to fuck (so can you sit it out the next time then?)

Apparently unlike its inspiration, they don’t actually care if you tell anyone. Unless it’s the cops. Though I doubt that’s because there’s been a recent crackdown in illegal lesbian sex fests. But probably because they are using someones warehouse without permission. Do they need a warehouse for a fuck club? I’m not sure. Currently their membership is five people though they are initiating four new members. Although their reasons aren’t too inspiring. They mainly seem to want to try something new. Will anyone be signing up to become full members? I will leave you in suspense for that answer.

Each member takes a newbie off and gives them a darn good seeing to, with the last being seen to by two members so she can fulfil her fantasy of being the Lucky Pierre in a strap-on sandwich. After that the nine girls get together and go nuts sex-wise.

And that sums it up plot wise. The story is almost non existent and this only barely counts as a parody, mainly because of that famous line, and the fact they’ve formed a club. They don’t end up forming some sort of militant group and the person running it doesn’t turn out to be part of the main characters imagination (spoiler). I would have liked to at least find out more about this warehouse. It’s owned by the boss of one of the members, and she would get fired if they found out. Wouldn’t that be an interesting turn of events if said boss suddenly turned up in the middle of it all? And gets wrestled down by nine sex hungry lesbians. Why do they even need a whole warehouse at all? I guess because at least its free. I’ve no idea what kind of fees this “Fuck Club” charges… I know I would be happy to pay them. Wouldn’t it be easier (and more legal) renting out their local community hall? Mondays: Martial Arts, Tuesdays: Spanish, Wednesdays: Lesbian Fuck Club.

Sex wise the film is pretty much non stop. Twosome, Twosome, Twosome, Threesome, Nine-some. And its hot, no complaints there. However, and its a big however. Orgy scenes should always be shot with more than one camera. The big thing that was missing was close ups. When you have 9 people going at it you are never going to get it all. So a second camera capturing all those… finer details would have been nice.